Merge Wright: Social Network Dating

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Social network datingOn line dating is on it’s way out. Yes, the hip young are saying buh bye, buh bye, so long. Welcome to Social Network dating. I’m not kidding these are actualapps for your phone to catch the love of your life hook, line and sinker while you’re at lunch today. 

Here are the top 5 dating apps for your smart phone.

1. POF (Plenty of Fish) 1.7million

2. Skout.com, 1.4million

3. Zoosk.com, 1.2million

4. eharmony, 500,000 

5. Match.com, 330,000. 

You’re lunching at Rooster’s you check your smart phone app “Singles Around Me” and up pops all thesingles at the moment and where they’re sitting. Whoa, select the cutest girl and say can I join you. Done! Two years later you’re tending the baby while she dresses for your night on the town. So simple. 

Now, what about the older crowd you know the over 70 crowd the AARP-ers are there any apps for them? Glad you asked. Yes, they have five apps too. 

1. Crushes.com (not crutches.com make sure you spell it correctly most senior smart phones will allow up to 18 point text it’s a good option to be safe) 

2. GeezerPleezers.com (allows for you to select fave hair tint like, purple-licious, hot silver, blond ambition, snow white and this girls on fire red) 

3. Depends.com (reliable and safe dates) 

4. ViagraGirls.com (former dancers that love to have fun) 

5. MachoMen.com (not YMCA guys...real 75 to 85 year old muscle men) Girls next time you’re at Tim Hortons for Bingo check your smart phone there could be a MachoMan or Depends guy sitting close by. 

Lucy, we need to download that “Singles Around Me” app and hit some of the hot spots and do a little research for a future column. I was thinking of the senior center in Centerville, I think there’s one in Lebanon too. I’ll be looking for the girls on fire and purple-lcious while you keep youreyes out for the macho men and we’ll see if we get beeps that we can some how match up in case they don’t have smart phones. This could be a real challenge.

I see where the Procrastinators club has changed their name hoping to swipe members from other service organizations plus latch on to those that want a longlist of clubs for their resume. Are you ready? Instead of Procrastinators they are now Optomorrowists not to be confused with Optimists. Their motto: Why Hurry, Slow Down...Tomorrow will be here soon enough. They support helping people to learn how to do things tomorrow instead of today. Their meetings are held on the last Thursday of the month which would be tomorrow I guess. You needto call tomorrow and make sure. The only exception to tomorrow is their dues which are always due today. 

Email Merge Wright at mergewright@yahoo.com

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