Merge Wright: "Body Heat" The New Version


“Body Heat” the new Version

Senior Citizen Centers of America report that over $50 million in IOUs and furniture liens were signed this past weekend as seniors donned their masks, turned their walkers on and raced to see the new “R” rated version of the 80’s hit “Body Heat”. Mr. Grey’s version is quite a bit more sexy. Grey a handsome 60 year old sales rep for Medicare insurance products looks for the good in all and spends a lot of his time kissing, holding hands and hugging senior ladies during his daily karaoke presentations.

Being a widower he’s looked on by the ladies as the Justin Beiber of the over 70 crowd. The girls are always screaming for a SELFIE with Grey to keep on their cell phones. Now, don’t get me wrong but there’s always a few that want the shady side and he provides numerous lights out sessions that senior laddies are loving. This is probably the biggest event SSCA has had since they added the wine bar by the hot tubs a couple of summers ago. The waiting list to get into one of the centers is unbelievable and the monthly stipend to stay has gone way up. See ya down at the hot tubs.

Do you realize when you take a shower and wash your feet you’re removing over one trillion bacteria on each foot? That’s two trillion bad guys down the drain. You put on socks and shoes, start walking and from out of nowhere they start multiplying again, it’s not right. My mind immediately jumped to the national debt trillions and then you have your computer terabytes ...trillions again. OK, space travel could be in trillions but they decided to call it light years so it doesn't count.

How can we clean up our feet 2 trillion times 6 billion people on earth and take that to the energy scientists and say, “Look, instead of coal, natural gas, oil how about harnessing these light years of bacteria that are on our feet.” “Can we put them to work make them useful instead of mooches?” I Googled my idea and found that in 2008 (12 years ago what’s taking so long) Science Daily had a story entitled, “Fuel Cell Uses Bacteria to Generate Electricity”. It can be done! By the way did anyone try multiplying 2 trillion times 6 billion to find out how many light years that actually comes to?

Don’t forget you can Merge Wright at

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